On Killing: The Psychological Cost of Learning to Kill in War and Society by Dave Grossman


Wow. Wow. Wow. I loved every word written in “On Killing.” Grossman is pure genius when it comes to understanding the psychology of killing. (After all the books I’ve read touching this subject AND seeing constant news about killing, I … Continue reading

Be The Change Week 38: Be Easy-Going


(I honestly didn’t think I would touch this “Be the Change” Devotional again because I literally failed to finish it last year. But I decided to plug away regardless and get to 52 weeks! Cheers to facing failures, getting back … Continue reading

The Cure for All Woes


Yes, I said it. Genuine, authentic salvation…as in being saved by Jesus Christ. As I write this I am aware that some may think this message is old news or cliche. But hopefully, I can write this message freshly for anyone that wants to end all the feelings of disappointment and grief that may  not have a meaningful relationship with God. Hopefully, I can this message that can lead you to faith in Him so that your annoyance, irritations, or possibly despairing outlook can end. This message is ages old, but it still has profound power that continues to change lives all over the world. 

We all try so hard to get it right. But we fail, right? I fail nearly all the time..did you see Day 6 of my sewing frenzy? Fail. But not only in the little things do I fail, but in the good things too, like being kind, honest, fair, patient, etc.

Next, people fail us. They fail you and me ALL THE TIME! Am I right? What do you do when someone fails you? How do you react? Are you the kind person you think you are?

Personally, I want the pieces to fall together perfectly. I want the reward of perfection, the reward of planning something and seeing it through. I want the rewards of hard work, faithfulness and integrity. I want the esteem and credit. And when it all crumbles or fails I get heartlessly, bummed out, frustrated, and mad at life and people.

crossBefore really walking with God, I suffered through depression, rage, and a even a broken spirit; I have been tempted to go to the dark side a time or two and maybe even have. But coming to genuine faith in Jesus changed all of that.

Simply being alive brings difficulty, pain, and suffering. Everyday challenges create two pathways. One path you can choose is of apathy, bitterness, depression, and/or hopelessness. The other is of faith. Simply put, although we struggle, we persevere!

So here’s the cure to end all earthly woes. Get saved. Except this doesn’t end all the bad stuff life is about. It gives us the ability to endure with strength, integrity, and joy despite the stuff going on in our lives.

Why is this the cure? An example from my life is any day that I am tired, or “fed up,” misunderstood, or feel stuck. I realize that I have been promised heaven -my beginning to eternal bliss with my Creator.

That day may not be my day. But one day, it will be! When things go haywire, the promise of complete perfection is just on the other side.  On days where I’m exhausted, I keep my focus on heaven! The promise of heaven works as my anchor of hope. This may sound crazy, but I look forward to that day where I will be in heaven.

Billy Graham says this stuff better than I do.

I realize we are only one breath away from death and life. Everyday we all live right on the cusp of heaven’s perfection, freedom, love, and peace. Do you realize that this promise could be yours if only you believed? All your guilt, bitterness, fears, hatred, hurts, pains, despair, and weariness could be remedied by faith in Jesus—who was sent to save you, bless you, heal you, and give you a hope to live for.

Scriptures say that everyone needs to be born again. We are all born once into the world through man. The second time is through the Spirit of God. Once you are born a second time, you will be born into a new spiritual life that gains you access to the wisdom and knowledge needed to bear the weight of this life. Through this second life (your life with Jesus) you will find true love, resistance to addictions, wisdom, and faith that can move mountains.

Jesus said, come to me my burden is light and my yoke is easy. If you put your faith in Jesus and in the words of the Bible, you too, can understand how our burdens can be lifted by the hope of eternity and faith in Jesus Christ.

If you would like to ask Jesus to be your personal Lord and Savior click the video and Billy Graham can lead you in a short simple prayer.

5 Simple Ways To Improve Your Marriage


With all of the reads I’ve gotten on my “Fix My Marriage” post. I decided to write a series of posts on this blessed topic. Below are 5 quickies to improving your marriage. (The hardest one may be the first … Continue reading

Book Review: Left of Bang! How The Marine Corp Combat Hunter Program Can Save Your Life by Patrick Van Horne

I loved this book! Left of Bang! How The Marine Corp Combat Hunter Program can Save Your Life by Patrick Van Horne is a fantastic, fast read. I won’t say it is the greatest written, but the program and the historical info on Afghanistan was truly insiders knowledge. The hunter program won’t save your life because it was made for military personnel on the field. (I think Gavin De Beckers books are more informative for saving your life.) However, the program can create a sense of control, ease, and predictability in new contexts.

left-of-bangEveryone can gain something from reading this book! Much lighter reading compared to the other books I have recently read. Despite the repetition of the book telling us that it was about the hunter program. This book was to the point, and fast to read. The material went in, and stayed in. (I like when books like that.)

I was amazed and intrigued by the amount of information on what the soldiers battled did while serving in Afghanistan. I’m typically not a “history buff” but I enjoyed learning about how they overcame the massive casualties of IED (Improvised Explosive Devices) explosions by developing the Marine Corp Combat Hunter Program.

Van Horne really made the information accessible to the lay person in any type of situation that gives them anxiety. My favorite part of the book was practicing the program in public places whether it was the mall, airport, or even at my church. He basically teaches smart surveillance. Also, when my husband and I watched, “The Hornet’s Nest” I felt like I had a working knowledge of the war in Afghanistan and knew what our soldiers were up against.

A tidbit of the program: First, you establish a baseline of expected behavior. Example: At an event or place, there are specific people invited, there is a dress code, certain things will take place during the event. You have to determine what is the “norm” for the given context and be aware of anomalies that stray from that baseline.  If some expected things DO NOT happen then there is a negative anomaly. If something MORE happens than this it is a positive anomaly. When this happens the person “surveying” the area can make more educated guesses and anticipate change in the environment rather than be caught off guard.

I recommend this book to anyone wanting to have a certain edge to their environments, anyone who is traveling soon, and would like to better know how to protect themselves in new contexts, or anyone on any protective or military force.

Book Review: Protecting The Gift by Gavin De Becker

Not the first book I read by Gavin, and not the last. He is outstanding. The first book of his that I read is titled, “The Gift of Fear.” I read it in college. It read like a thriller. It was so helpful in understanding my own body’s signals of fear and interpreting threatening behavior and situations.

In “Protecting the Gift,” Gavin informs his reader of the strategies of people who seek to do harm to children. He provides key insight for developing an acute awareness to your environment whether you are shopping at a familiar mall or at the beach on vacation. Although, some children may be too young to understand the threat of real world predators, he urges parents and caregivers to be the guardians and gatekeepers of their inner circle.

He teaches his readers to:

1) Develop a system of awareness when in a new environment.

2) Research schools and public environments for safety rules.

3) He emphasizes the value of keeping a healthy, trusting relationship with your children.

4) He touches on the gun issue in this country and how it affects our youth.

5) He gives plenty of jaw-dropping stats on the world of violence and crime in our youth, and who is most likely to become affected by it and at what point in childhood.

If you are seeking to understand the world from an experts point of view regarding safety and how to take preventive measures this book is for you. It is difficult at times to come face to face with the challenges our children confront at schools, neighbor’s houses, family environments, and even babysitters they don’t like. But it is SO good for us as parents, teachers, or as any caregiver to understand the other side of life.

You will come away from this book trusting your intuitive guide and hunches. You will feel confident that your hunch is not just on a hunch but more of an informed and “educated guess.” You will become more sensitive to your children’s voices whether they are whining, crying, angry, or acting out, they could be telling you something but don’t have all the words to describe it.

Book Review: Mindhunter by John E. Douglas

This is not the type of book that I would normally read but every time I saw it on our bookshelf, I wanted to read it. At the same time, I was completely intimidated by the subject matter. “Mindhunter: Inside The FBI’s Elite Serial Crime Unit” by John E Douglas is John Douglas’s career path that lead into the development of Serial Crime Profiling, specifically serial killers. It is well written. At times in the beginning it is slow, but overall the pacing is great. The finish is one of the smoothest finishes I have read in books -not rushed and thought through.

Four things I took away from this book are:

Anyone’s path to discover their passion and their niche is not a straight path. John Douglas chose a variety of roles for the FBI. After moving within the FBI and gaining more experience, he refined what he was good at. And became the man who not only developed the system of Serial Killing Profiling, but mastered it too. I think we all have similar paths. It may take a while to refine but if we stick with it, we will become the masters of our destiny.

Profiling is a legit system used to aid in the capturing of criminals. It is not based on race. It is based on an entire personhood drawn from habits and experiences in a persons life: history of felonies, age bracket, cars driven, education, military experience, drug or alcohol abuse, etc. The most telling of all details is the victim and the crime, not the criminal at all. Douglas could tell you what type of guy did the crime solely based on the forensics. This was the most impressive skill presented.

Nearly all serial killers are made not born. Almost all of the serial killers were men who had abusive upbringings. Specifically, time and time again, they had a domineering or very controlling, abusive mother. The stories about how mothers would abuse their sons broke my heart. Other factors include bullying because of a physical impairment in particular speech impediments.

I don’t want to go anymore into the details of this book because it is difficult material to stomach. His book confirmed natural hunches and ideas I had about people in this subject matter.

It breaks my heart that there are many abused children in our country that feel they are not loved; and eventually as adults, decide they are their own avengers. They come to this conclusion because no one stood in the gap for them while they suffered innocently.

This book is not an easy read. Read it with caution. Read it prayerfully. People who may like this book might be a policeman, FBI agent, psychologist, or a writer.

It’s Been a Long Time!

Motherhood seriously took over my life! It’s been great, but I have missed the mornings where I sit down with a cup of joe, listen to sweet morning stillness with the birds, and can actually hear myself finish a full thought! I’ve been somewhat scatter brained BUT definitely for the good of my 3-year-old and 18 month old boys.

Hi, my name is Leanne. I’ve had many nicknames like Lea, LeLe, and others I won’t mention. But for this site I chose Elle. The word ‘she’ is relatable, “Elle” is phonetically the first letter of my name, and Elle can be rewritten to create LeLe, so I decided I like Elle. (People have said I think too much…its possible that the reason for this is my musical training…and yes, I think too much.)  I’m a mother of two boys and a wife to a very amazing husband (you can check his work out here.)

I love being a wife, a mother, and these things: writing, reading, playing and teaching piano, crafting, sewing, making new friends, listening, the Bible and Jesus.

What have I been up to the past 5 months while not writing? 1. I began teaching piano lessons again! Woohoo! I didn’t realize how much I missed teaching young minds music theory and how to play the piano! 2. I have been on tangential reading lists; reading books authors mention in any current book I am on. I have read about six or seven books…thats really just been the past 2 months or so. (I’ll write reviews on them in separate posts.) Who knew the book “On Killing” would create more compassion and love? I feel like a Mother Theresa after reading that one! That reminds me…(note to self) -Read a biography on Mother T. 3. I am also in the midst of branding my quilts and bags. I’ll probably have some subtle way of dropping it in these posts. 4. I have held down the fort and stayed active with my family. Cooking, baking, grocery shopping, home maintenance…like starting up and fixing two swamp coolers cutting down trees.

Well, I won’t use up my gracious 30 minutes on a recap (they are bound to wake up any minute now).

Thank you to my followers who have checked back with my site from time to time looking for something fresh. Hopefully, I can steal the time to write important posts the way Jack Sparrow steals the Black Pearl to search for and find the gold.

If you are a new reader check out my “Be The Change”  archive. The posts there have been my most recent teachings that give you an idea about what I do here!

Discover the Good Life with Me? Follow Grace for Elle!

Cheers, happy reading, and have a great summer!





Encouragement For A Broken Spirit

I’m deviating from my Be The Change a bit here. But I thought being so close to Christmas and all, there may be broken people who search for encouragement. If that’s you, I hope my blog encourages you, gives you strength, and jumpstarts some faith.

I know what a broken spirit is like. I’ve been broken to the point where I couldn’t recognize anything else in life except pain suffering. I had endless amounts of pain, and questions that I couldn’t answer. I saw the vanity of life passing by; I wondered if I could enjoy my life again. How could I enjoy it with the same ignorant bliss?

I got used to my broken spirit. I felt mangled, horrid, and I couldn’t grow or flourish in anything. I felt stuck in this state of uselessness on top of those layers of thoughts, I questioned how forgiveness really works, how the healing process works. I didn’t know if it really would work. Would I become whole again?

There was one scripture that I pondered over daily. Proverbs 18:14, “The human spirit can endure sickness, but a crushed spirit who can endure?” Could I endure this? I guess I had been enduring it for quite a while. I left my answer open. Eventually…

My answer became a ‘yes.’ Not only did I endure and persevere, I began to thrive. But it began with Jesus. I’m not one to give up on myself, life, or those around me, but I knew I couldn’t do this great internal work alone. I needed someone who had been crushed by those he loved and came out alive! I needed the strength of a Savior, I needed Jesus.

A broken spirit is a unique thing. You experience the rawness of your humanity, yet being so close to death (in a spirit kinda way) its a sort of wandering state. It can take you back to purity and innocence. It can lead you to truth. It makes you trust in the one and only thing you should trust in…God -instead of putting your hopes and trust in people. It does all this while demanding you to actually HAVE FAITH -and leaves you to be dumbfounded as to how the pieces are going to be put back together.

When you are a broken, wandering, spirit its difficult to even find where “faith” is in all the chaos of shattered you. But everyone can find even the smallest mustard seed of faith.

This state of brokenness is not forever. There is a way to be made whole again. 2 Corinthians 5:17 “Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creature; the old things passed away; behold, new things have come.” Jesus can make all things new. How or why? He was crushed in spirit and in body, he died and came back to life. Resurrected, he has the power to make you whole again.

I can’t begin to tell you how amazing the results are when you trust in Christ with your brokenness, but the one thing that stands out to me is amazing strength and incredible backbone. And love. When your strength and backbone are built by God its powerful love. I’ve realized that it is God’s love that creates the strongest will and backbone anyone could ever ask for. It’s amazing that God uses what we think is broken and worthless and turns it into something strong, faithful, and loving.

There’s so much to say on this topic of brokenness but I’ll end it here. I’m already way over my “less than 500” rule.

Leaving you with: 2 Corinthians 12:9 “But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.”

Be strong through the season. He will carry you through if you ask him for it.




Be The Change Devotional Week 37: Be Tenacious


“Nothing in the world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not; nothing is more common than unsuccessful men with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not; the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent.” -Ray Kroc

If I could sum up the invaluable qualities of a tenacious spirit this quote does it. One could have all the talent in the world, another could have all the clever ideas, and even an educated person who has degrees of knowledge will amount to nothing in the light of someone who has all those things and tenacity.

I hear people talk and talk about million dollar ideas (I even search my mind for that one brilliant idea too). People get so passionate, excited, inspired, worked up and even worried over their “idea.” Yet, what is never present is the ability to see and chase their dream idea tenaciously.

The future of an idea should be seen as distant. It takes a long time for an idea to mature. Along the way, it requires commitment, hard work, discipline, and a no-quit attitude. Discovering the power of tenacity will give you the ability to wrestle with your idea until it is brilliant. What is your M.O. with “big” ideas? How do you trouble-shoot any problems along your journey? 

When an idea fails, we end up in the back alleys and dead end projects. We arrive here because we failed to do something along the way. Some of us sit there. Some of us quit. But the tenacious person will cling to his idea and find a way to make it work. They solve every single problem and even work to prevent them.

What ideas do you have that need to be pursued, chased, completed? Some people work on everyday things like relationships, personal growth, and career goals. Others pursue an entrepreneurial idea. Whatever it is…

Be tenacious! Week 36 is for people who want to be go getters, goal chasers, and doers. Don’t fall into the trap of “someday”…don’t standby watching others realize their dream

Go get it! Don’t let training, resources, or thoughts of lack discourage you this week. The truth is that you have everything you need! As you seek to be the change you will discover that tenacity is all you need. The support, resources, and momentum follow the tenacious person.

Be tenacious.

If you liked this you may also like similar articles: Week 36, Week 32, Week 26.

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